Honor your heroes
Pay forward to others the gift that was given to you
By Jim Huling
March 2009
"You probably don’t
remember me,” read the
opening line of a letter
I received one morning.
When I glanced at the
name typed below the signature, I was transported back
18 years to my first significant role as a leader.
Kate was a software developer who was brilliantly talented but struggling to work
as part of our team. Because
of her strong personality and
fierce determination, she had
damaged many relationships
and created a reputation that
she was only interested in
her own success.
Kate and I began to meet
twice each week, discussing
behaviors that would help
her to build trust with the
people on her team and
practicing different ways
of responding to situations. She worked hard,
and over time, she rebuilt
the trust of her team-mates so strongly that she
was promoted to a leadership role — a recognition
that her team enthusiastically endorsed.
Now, 18 years later, she
had written a heartfelt letter
to express what my coaching and my care for her as a
person had meant to her life.
She described the things she
had learned in our sessions
and how they had become
essential to her career but
also how they had helped
her as a spouse, a mother
and a friend.
The impact of Kate’s letter
was overwhelming and
brought me to tears. It not
only gave me a sense of deep
satisfaction, but it also rekindled my purpose as a leader.
Today, that letter is one of my
most treasured mementos.
Honor your heroes
by expressing
your gratitude
Do you remember your
heroes? Stop and think about
the teachers, mentors, leaders
and friends who helped shape
the person you are today.
Remember those who patiently taught you the skills that
made you successful, who
offered advice and help when
you were struggling, and who
encouraged you in a time of
need. Now ask yourself a single question: Do they know
how much they meant to you?
Most likely, they don’t. And
they never will unless you tell
them.
Kate’s letter inspired me to
begin writing to my own
heroes — creating for them
the same experience she gave
me. Over the years, I’ve written to former teachers and old
friends and even to authors
like Stephen Covey, whose
work was pivotal in my life. In
the process, I made an unexpected discovery: writing a letter of appreciation is equally
as joyous as receiving one.
I challenge you to have this
same experience by writing to
one of your heroes this week.
When you do, you will know
the impact that expressing
your gratitude can have, both
on your heroes and on you.
Honor your heroes by
modeling their lessons
As I wrote to each of my
heroes, I was reminded not
only of the principles they
taught me but also the example they set in living them out.
For some, I knew that I was still practicing what I had
learned, but for others, I realized that I had forgotten their
valuable teaching. Writing
each letter gave me a renewed
sense of accountability to
make sure their lessons were
not lost.
As you write your own letters, keep a list of the principles and characteristics
you’ve learned and use it to
hold yourself accountable.
Remember that the greatest
tribute to your heroes will
always be through the life
you lead.
Honor your heroes
by becoming a hero
If you could ask them, each
of your heroes would want
only one thing in return for all
they gave you: that you give
the same gift of time, attention
and genuine caring to someone else.
Look closely and you will
see countless people who
need what you have to offer:
young people in need of mentoring and encouragement,
former co-workers who now
need help finding a job, over-stressed managers whose personal lives are near the breaking point, and senior workers
struggling to learn new skills.
It’s not easy to make time to
help someone, but it’s important. And it’s the debt of honor
you owe to your heroes.
One day you will look back
on your life and be unable to
remember all the urgent tasks
you now face. But you will
never forget the people you’ve
helped. And they will never
forget you.
JIM HULING is an executive consultant, a national keynote speaker and a professional coach. His leadership experience spans over 30 years, including a decade as CEO of a company recognized four times
as one of the “25 Best Companies to Work For in America.” Jim is also the author of “Choose Your Life!
a powerful proven method for creating the life you want.” He can be reached at jim@jimhuling.com.
